Thursday, June 23, 2005

Aggression by Otto F. Kernberg

Quite the eye opener this one is. It's a clinical psychology book that has a chapter on hatred and how narcissists are unable to refrain from hating their significant other and a bunch of other things mean lying cheats do.It even explains why which really angered me. Knowing that liars lie because they are full of anger and take particular pleasure in lying to you makes it unacceptable that I ever let a liar lie to me without letting them know that I think they are a liar.I stumbled across this book while hunting around a Barnes and Nobles trying to find a book that was honest about why cheaters do what they do. Unsurprisingly if they are a narcissist they are just filled with hatred towards their significant other. Which was the title of the second chapter, hatred. It seems you aren't worthy unless they aren't.It is very technical with very big words. For a more easily understandable treatment of the subject search for "aggression" and "narcissistic" on answers.com. The results returned are really from wikipedia.com but I like the extra results answers.com gives. I sure wish I had taken my psychology elective in college now. Apparently this is psychology 101. Could have saved myself a lot of trouble earlier if I'd had more interest in the subject back in school.

Originally posted on June 23, 2005 at my other blog:

Aggression by Otto F. Kernberg

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Men are from Mars Woman are from Venus

Everyone must read this book. It just makes your life a heck of a lot easier.This book helps people give peace, love, and understanding a chance. Especially in understanding of the communications problem between men and woman. The translations between what men say and women hear and what women say and what men hear alone are worth the price of the book. And that is where the book starts. Although you have to muddle through the first 3 discouraging chapters to get to the translations. After that it is all gravy especially the last few chapters. I am not recommending jumping around in the book though as there is a lot to digest and it is already easy to read and use.You can start using the pearls of wisdom gleaned from this book immediately after reading them because they are presented in a what is said or happening translated to what it means depending on the sex of the speaker and listener. There are recommended correct responses. And concise explanations of why to steer clear of the knee jerk defensive responses we all use. The meaning of the correct and wrong responses obvious and hidden meanings are revealed in simple numbered lists covering the bulk of the classic communications cliches.This is Communications 101 for the betterment of the rest of your life. Learn to understand and successfully navigate situations where you find yourself saying WTF just happened. You too can turn negative comments from your partner into a feel good love fest if you would only read this book! So go ahead and read it already. ;)Guys this books spells out what you are not listening means and exactly how to listen so you can get brownie points.Ladies this book spells out what a man giving you the cold shoulder means and exactly how to respond so you too can get brownie points.Read this book and start using it immediately to make sense of what is unsaid and misconstrued in almost all our communications with each other.

Originally posted on June 18, 2005 at my other blog:
Men are from Mars Woman are from Venus